Diary – Sad and so fuzzy

Monday 12th September 2022

I wake on Friday 9th September to the fuzz.

The feeling is like everything inside my head is all jangling about, feels a little like a pinball machine. The metal ball bearing rolling around, not quite connecting.

So hard to focus today

I go to the washing machine to load some laundry, once an easy task. Today so difficult.

I’m turning the dial trying to find the correct program, this is something that usually takes me seconds. Not this morning, it’s like owning a brand new washing machine, unsure of what each symbol on the dial means.

I select a program, fingers crossed, I hope for the best. Deep down I have a feeling it’s wrong…Too late now the machine is filling with water!

Oh they are only clothes!

In the kitchen I sit with a cup of tea looking out into the garden. I can see the garden mouse scurrying across the patio, hiding in between the plant pots. Such a cute little mouse!…Then again there is most probably more than one mouse!

I can hear Stephen Seagull calling from our rooftop, he can be so loud! Funny how his calls don’t bother me, in fact I love the sound.

Always reminds me of the seaside…Oh yes I live at the seaside!

I turn the tv on, all the TV channels are in respect of Queen Elizabeth whom died yesterday ( Thursday 8th September)

I watch for a short while, but then experience a deep wave of sadness.

I turn off the TV

I’m not being disrespectful, I’m just finding it all quite overwhelming.

Such feelings of sadness for a person I had never even met. Yet it’s like I knew her in a strange way.

After all she was the longest reigning monarch in British history, personally have never known anything else, along with hundreds of thousands other people.

The reaction to her death has been global. So when I turn on the tv, I can see the sadness, hear the sadness in peoples voices.

It’s such a sad, sad day!

When there is a death of a famous or prominent figure, the world is sad, we sighs a little but then we seem to move on.

This has felt totally different, the worlds reaction on Thursday evening was much more heartfelt, at times quite intense.

The outpouring of grief that is over flowing on social media sites and on tv is world wide…so much sadness.

Will the monarchy ever be the same again?

The poems the sketches that have been shared are just beautiful.

The Jubilee sketch will always stay with me, so I will end on a memory of Our Great Queen having fun with Paddington Bear

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